


Language Barriers

by Kantayra



Category: Transformers (Bay Movies)
Genre: Crack, Gen, Humor
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2007-12-22
Updated: 2007-12-22
Packaged: 2017-10-19 02:57:12
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 246
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/196096
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Kantayra/pseuds/Kantayra
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Unfortunately, the Autobots had picked up their English from the internet.</p>
            </blockquote>





	Language Barriers

**Author's Note:**

> There was one grossly inaccurate thing in this movie about alien robots that turn into cars. I figured it was my duty to rectify the situation. So, I present to you, the Autobots' _real_ first contact with humans. :P Obviously inspired by [this icon](http://img.photobucket.com/albums/v143/Kantayra/seals-snacky.png), created by the infamous Snacky.

TO: pentagon@usa.gov  
FROM: autobots@cybertron.gov  
SUBJECT: ALIEN INVASION INCREASE UR PEEN1S S1ZE!!!  
DATE: Thu, 17 May 2007 07:54:26 -1100

ZOMG ONOZ!!1 Megatron, LIEK WHOA! free ci@lis all spark FTW!

megatron: O RLY?  
optimus 1: YA RLY!  
megatron: NO WAI!  
optimus 1: YA WAI!!!  
PWNED! ROTFLMAO

ph34r teh decepticons 4 REELZ! their haxx0rz r in ur base killin ur d00dz! u have no chance 2 survive make your time. hahahaha

4 free meds call autobots!!! ttyl

***

Optimus Prime frowned at the screen. “For some reason, our warning has once again been intercepted by this nefarious ‘spam filter’.”

“Did you remember to include the proper formal Earth greeting this time?” Ratchet inquired.

“‘Increase ur peen1s s1ze’ is in the subject.”

“You _did_ leave off the ‘click 4 nekkid horny sluts’ protocol,” Ironhide pointed out.

“We tried that last time,” Optimus Prime argued. “The ‘spam filter’ destroyed that warning as well.”

“WTF? NO WAI! ZOMG!” exclaimed Jazz.

Optimus Prime frowned further. “Perhaps relying on this ‘internet’ to learn the humans’ language has failed us once again…”

“WUT? NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO! STFU!” Jazz insisted.

“I advise moving on to Plan B,” Ratchet countered.

“Agreed,” Optimus Prime nodded. “Send Bumblebee his new instructions.” He scanned the e-mail they’d sent once more. “We can only hope that direct contact with the humans will allow us to better decipher this complex Earth ‘n3tsp34k’.”

“LOL, n00bs!” Jazz couldn’t help but snicker to himself as the new plan was activated.


End file.
